Crazy Quotes For A Crazy World!

 

We scour the planet for crazy news…

And go around it! with….

The Crazy News: Quick Quotes.

Holland

“We saw something bobbing about in the sea and we decided to take it out of the water.”

Workers from a drinks stall in the Dutch resort of Zandvoort tell a tall tale about a giant Lego man that washed up on the beach.

You can even buy one of these ridiculously oversized Lego men on eBay right now! Bidding at 80 bucks US.

Germany

“In the countryside we’re used to people going at police with muck spreaders, but this was something else.”

A police spokesman discusses how a crazed farmer used his tractor and a muck spreader to ram and spray squad cars, and eluding capture for seven hours by hiding in the nearby woods, he was finally arrested by an elite police unit.

India

“Sindhudurg has the lowest decadal population growth rate of 4. Our aim is to reduce the decadal population growth rate by at least by 10 by 2010.”

Authoriies in the Indian State of Maharashtra are taking desperate measure to curb massive populating growth, offering a 5000-rupee “honeymoon package” to any couple who delays the birth of their first child by two years, and a 7500-rupee package if they can hold off for three years.

UK

“The noise just went on and on. Not for weeks but for months.”

Neighbours of Diane Duffin from Leeds, England, complain about the inccessant and very loud playing of country and western hits like 9 to 5 and Stand By Your Man at all hours of the day and night. Oh the humanity!

USA

“I know what I did was wrong.”

A Catholic priest from a small town in Colorado confesses to police about the naked late night jogging he had been doing. He had been running nude at a high school track and didn’t think anyone would be around at that time of day, but was apprehended by an off duty officer with no sense of humour.

Columbia

“It was the way he moved, the shape of the hair he was using, all of this prompted suspicions.”

A regional police chief talks about the arrest of a man dressed as a woman, who was posing as the wife of another man in an attempt to allude the authorites. He was wanted for murder and ”planning terrorist acts against the security forces.” ¡Ahora, eso está loco!

And that was yet another crazy edition of, The Crazy News: Quick Quotes…..

I need a breather after that!

Go on, tell the world!

The meaning of sex: It’s lust stupid! Or is it?

 

You’re all crazy!

Ask yourself this highly philosophical question…

Why do we have sex?

Is it for the procreation of the species? Is it because everyone else is doing it?

Or is it because ‘it feels goooood?

Well someone has taken the time to get to the bottom of this; researchers from the University of Texas and elsewhere in the US have had sex on the brain for quite some time now.

Teams of Psychologists have come up with some new studies on sexual behaviour, finding that the ‘hormone pumping’ young get their freak on for all the same reasons… “I was attracted to the person, ” But when it came to the older demorgaphics they do it ”for all sorts of reasons”.

In a compilation from 237 reasons for sex, answers ranged from “The person smelled nice” to “I wanted to burn calories”, “I wanted to get out of doing something, and “‘I wanted to give someone else an STD”.

How can a woman get a man to take off his clothes? Ask him.

In all the list compiled from questions asked of hundreds of people, which was then given to college aged students, and that study concluded that ’20 of the top 25 reasons given for having sex were the same for men and women.’

Wacky reasons young people had sex included, “someone offered me money to do it,” “I felt sorry for the person,” “I wanted to punish myself” and, “Because of a bet.”

The findings can be found in the August issue of Archives of Sexual Behavior, published by the International Academy of Sex Research.

More interesting reading on this crazy topic from the New York Times.

And won’t someone feel sorry for me….?

Other hilarious reasons for having sex include;

13. I wanted to improve my sexual skills. 34. I was curious about my sexual abilities.  41. The person was a good dancer. . 65. I wanted to relieve ‘‘blue balls.’’ 90. I wanted to gain access to that person’s friend. 110. The person had too much to drink and I was able to take advantage of them. 119. The person was famous and I wanted to be able to say I had sex with him/her. 181. I felt like it was my duty. 7. I was ‘‘horny.’’

See the full ’periodic table of why we have sex’ list HERE!

Or you can read the entire 31 page journal report HERE!

Or just talk about the list, here. Like right here. 

Go on, tell the world! Bookmark this story.

Life sucks being the real Harry Potter, as school teacher ruins the party!

    “Harry who?”

In the classic 1999 movie Office Space there is a character named Michael Bolton, a situation with hilarious consequences.

But in real life it sure would suck sharing the same name with someone well known.

Particularly if that someone is a fictional character, a character so popular that you couldn’t escape being asked the same question by almost everyone you met.

It might even be so bad that you might want to consider changing your name, if it wasn’t for the fact that you had your name first, years before a certain wealthy British author was even conceived!

In this case it’s a man sharing the same name as boy wizard Harry Potter.

News Reports:

Each time a new Harry Potter book or movie comes out, Florida resident Harry Potter gets phone calls from children, interview requests from TV networks and autograph requests.

“The kids want to know if I’m Harry Potter,” he said with a chuckle. “I tell them I’ve been Harry Potter for darn near 80 years!”

The real Harry Potter said he has not had time to read any of the J.K. Rowling books or see the hit movies. But the retired U.S. Defense Department employee gets his fun out of Pottermania.

“When Harry talks to the kids, they’ll ask about the owl and he’ll say, ‘Oh, he came by and brought the mail,’” said his wife, Jan. “Then, when they’re done, the mothers come on and say thank you for talking to the kids. He gets a big kick out of it.”

But meeting a real Harry Potter can be a little puzzling for the kids.

“They look at you, give you the once-over,” he said, laughing. “They can’t relate the one in the book to the one they see here. I guess I could buy me a pair of Harry Potter glasses.”

I wonder what he thinks of the petition to save Harry Potter?

Meanwhile, in Harry Potter related crazy news…

The Daily Mail reports:

A headmistress at a school in England is in big trouble with the pupils.

At a end of school semester assembly 400 children aged under 12 were shocked as Carolyn Banfield took the latest Harry Book, Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, and read from the last page.

Parents and kids alike are now outraged, as many had intended to read what is expected to be the last in the series of books to have swept the world.

 Louie Swift, nine, said: “I don’t know why she read it. She’s not usually a spoilsport. She didn’t even mention she had the book.

“She just picked it up and started reading it to us.”

Jordan Ashton, ten, complained: “It has spoiled the book for me.”

The parent of an 8-year-old was fuming when she talked to the tabloid.

 ”He’s read the last three books but there’s no point reading this one now.”

Another mother, who declined to be named, said: “It’s appalling. My son was going to read a book instead of playing on his computer and I was going to have some peace and quiet. “

Those poor kids, they’ll be scared for life!

Oh, the humanity.

No word as to the motivation of reading the final page to the kiddies, but I suspect she had one of two reasons.

1- She wanted to be seen as ‘cool’ by all the kids, which has clearly backfired, in spectacular fashion.

OR

2- She wanted all those kids to have a miserable holiday break, forcing them to go outside and get exercise in the dreaded outdoors.

 What an evil woman…..

Sounds like something out of a Harry Potter novel!

Maybe the kids could occupy themselves with the craziness of the Potter Puppet Pals !

 

Boss kills employees because they ‘asked for a pay rise.’

 

Smirk of a killer- Lithuanian native Rolandas Milinavicius dosn’t seem to like pesky employees much at all.

 Asking your boss for a pay rise can be a daunting task at best, and it seems especially so for those working in the car dealership industry.

So if you thought your boss was a bit of a psycho, spare a thought for Inga Contreras and Martynas Simokaitis.

Police in Georgia, USA, have charged Rolandas Milinavicius with the murder of his two employees after they questioned him over not being happy about the pay.

He has confessed to shooting the pair.

Local media reports:

Milinavicius, who was having financial problems, told police he shot the two Thursday after they kept asking for more pay.

“As I understand, the employees were not really happy about the pay, and they had questioned him about it over the course of time,” a police spokesman said. “That morning he said he just snapped.”

Contreras and Simokaitis were cremated and an informal memorial service was held at Simokaitis’ cousin’s apartment over the weekend. The remains were to be flown to Lithuania on Tuesday.

“It doesn’t make any sense,” the cousin, Jaunius Simokaitis, of Fayetteville, said Monday. “If he was having money problems, these two would have been the ones to help him get out of debt. They would have helped him make that money.”

He was denied bail by a judge.

Video story from local Atlanta News..

Let this be a lesson to us all….

Never work in a car dealership.

Better yet, join a union before you ask for a pay rise.

Even better yet, don’t ask for a payrise at all.

Who needs money right?

Better yet, take some good advice on how to handle workplace politics from our friends at CNN Living: Four co-workers you should befriend.

Go on, tell the world! Bookmark this story.

New sex toy set to revolutionise society?

 

Yeah baby, that’ll hit the spot! 

Taking its name from the iPod craze that’s been sweeping the world for the past few years, the ‘gPod’ has the potential to revolutionise society in unimaginable ways.

The gPod is a phallic-shaped vibrator that consists of a handset that can connect to a music player (like your iPod), television or mobile phone and vibrates to the sounds it picks up.

How groovy.

Media Reports:

Ichiro Kameda is the brain behind the invention which was showcased at Japans first ever sex toy expo in suburban Tokyo.

“You can use it in many ways, for example hooking it up to your mobile phone… so one of the ideas is that you can use it here in Tokyo when your boyfriend in New York is talking to you on the phone,” Kameda told media.

Kameda said he had spent four years trying to design a product when he hit upon the concept.

When asked on how he came about the idea, Kameda declined an answer.

Nearly 160 companies or groups were exhibiting products and services during the weekend Adult Treasure Expo 2007, including sex toys, sex machines, costumes and videos.

The sex toy is set to retail at ¥25,000 or about US$200 and is marketed by Japanese sex toy company Joymind.

There are some mourmours that Apple may want to legally take on Joymind in court over trademarks to the naughty device.

No word yet as to when it will be avaliable for order. But if I were to take a guess, I’de say it’s going to be the top gift for Christmas 2008.

You think I’m joking?

Think again. Female sex toys are more popular than ever, and growing at a huge rate.

For more on the latest trends click here.

You heard it here first.

How The?: Mystery of the stolen pool, where did the water go?

 

Just gone.
“I just want to know what the heck they did with the water”

Daisy Valadivia woke up one morning to find that her family’s inflatable pool, hip high, 10 feet in diameter and filled with water, had been stolen from her backyard in the middle of the night.

The weirdest part of all she says, is that there is no evidence at all that the water was poured out, pumped out, evaporated or drunk.

“I’ve never heard of a pool being stolen, let alone one with water in it,” Valdivia said

The story from New Jersey, USA.

The Face of Death: Oscar the Cat Predicts the End.

 

The Grim Reaper looks nothing like what we we’re lead to believe.

The Grim Reaper looks like this.

The face of death?

Media reports:

A 2-year-old cat called Oscar has become a medical celebrity after being identifed as a furry harbinger of death.
The cat lives in a third-floor dementia unit in a nursing home in Rhode Island,USA and has displayed an uncanny knack for predicting when patients are going to die by curling up next to them in their final hours.

So far, according to an article in today’s New England Journal of Medicine, he has presided over the deaths of 25 patients at the Steere House Nursing and Rehabilitation Centre.

“His mere presence at the bedside is viewed by physicians and nursing home staff as an almost absolute indicator of impending death, allowing staff members to adquately notify families,” the Journal reported.

From the New England Journal of Medicine.

Oscar arrives at Room 313. The door is open, and he proceeds inside.

Mrs. K. is resting peacefully in her bed, her breathing steady but shallow. She is surrounded by photographs of her grandchildren and one from her wedding day.

Despite these keepsakes, she is alone. Oscar jumps onto her bed and again sniffs the air. He pauses to consider the situation, and then turns around twice before curling up beside Mrs. K.

One hour passes. Oscar waits. A nurse walks into the room to check on her patient. She pauses to note Oscar’s presence. Concerned, she hurriedly leaves the room and returns to her desk. She grabs Mrs. K.’s chart off the medical-records rack and begins to make phone calls.

Within a half hour the family starts to arrive. Chairs are brought into the room, where the relatives begin their vigil

See the full journal article here.

US politicians organise family fun day with M-16s and Uzi machine guns.

 

The Crazy News: Only in America

So many weird and wacky stories come out of the US every day, but this is the craziest of them so far.

US media reports:

A political fundraiser in the US state of New Hampshire aims to promote gun ownership in America by letting supporters fire powerful military-style weapons — from Uzi submachine guns to M-16 rifles.

The Manchester Republican Committee is inviting party members and their families to a “Machine Gun Shoot” where, for $25, supporters can spend a day trying out automatic weapons, said organizer Jerry Thibodeau.

“It’s a fun day. It’s a family day,” said Thibodeau of the August 5 event. “It’s quite exciting.”

A family fun day of gun shooting madness! Good fun for young and old.

I mean, young children with automatic weapons designed to kill on mass, what harm could it do?

Now excuse me while I go throw up…

And now for some more family entertainment, Playboy models with automatic machine guns.

Crazy: Horney Hedgehogs, Kangaroo Shoes, Siesta Laws & Deep Fried Mouse

 

Around the World on Wednesday with;

The Crazy News: Quick Quotes!

USA

“Good thing I seen it. I got it all the way up to my mouth, I felt the fur, I brought it back down and just looked at it and threw it behind my back.”

Jack Hines, a 66-year-old former laborer from rural Montana, USA on his finding of a deep-fried mouse in his bag of barbecue potato chips.

Hungary

“Do you agree that the Parliament of the Republic of Hungary should make a law about introducing the siesta?”

That’s the question 8 million Hungarians will be faced with if a referendum on whether or not there should be a national siesta law.  Vote should take place in 2008 if 200,000 signatures are collected.

USA

“Although adidas makes some shoes using kangaroo leather, a common practice in our industry, adidas does not make shoes from any endangered or threatened kangaroo species.”

Spokesperson for sports product Adidas responds after a California’s Supreme Court rules that the company could not sell shoes made from kangaroo leather in the US State.

Germany

“The pair were loudly engaged in ensuring the continuity of their species”

A German Police officer discusses the discovery of two horney hedgehogs making a disturbing amount of noise in the front garden of a house.

Arrested for DUI, agian: Lindsay Lohan like soo wants to be like Paris.

 The Crazy News: Celeb Goss

 

Drink driving is fun!

Looks like America’s number 2 most famous for being famous/movie starlet/singer etc has not been listening to her good pal Paris Hilton’s warning”to be responsible and have a designated driver!”

21-year-old  Hollywood wild child Lindsay Lohan was arrested just hours ago by Los Angles police on suspicion of drunken driving and cocaine possession, days after she completed a 45-day rehabilitation program.

Media report:

Police said they had received a report of a car chase and that Lohan and two companions were in the pursuing vehicle.

She was taken into custody after failing a field sobriety test. A subsequent search yielded some cocaine in her pocket, police said.

Lohan was booked on suspicion of drunken driving, cocaine possession and driving on a suspended license. She was held in the Santa Monica jail.

Lohan was released on $25,000 bail. According to police, she will be arraigned on Aug. 23.

The actress recently spent more than a month at Promises rehabilitation facility in Malibu and she’s already facing a drunken driving charge in Beverly Hills.

Lohan agreed to wear an alcohol-detecting anklet upon her release from the Promises treatment center in Malibu, but it was unclear if that played a role in the traffic stop.

The latest news is sure to do wonders for her world-wide celebrity profile. Just look how much attention Paris got! 

You go sister!

Video: Puppy takes on rattlesnake, survives to fight another day!

 The unlikely hero.

 The most famous Chihuahua in the world is probably our friend Paris Hilton’s 3,000 Euro pet/fashion accessory Tinkerbell.

 Move over Tinkerbell

But an unlikely hero has emerged to take that most famous Chihuahua spot away.

And it has the hallmarks of an epic battle of David and Goliath proportions.

A puppy Chihuahua named Zoey is being hailed as a hero after taking on an aggravated rattlesnake who threatened a 1-year-old boy in the backyard of a town in Colorado, USA.

Media Reports:

Zoey was in her master’s back yard, July 12, in the foothills west of Loveland.

Her master, Monty Long, was sitting on his back patio watching his grandson, Booker West.

The toddler was playing by the birdbath when Zoey darted between him and a rock on the other side. The rattlesnake was on the rock.

“As soon as she went in she yipped and came running back out,” Long said.

The grandfather said he ran over and grabbed the toddler, then took him out of harms way. Then, he said, he grabbed a pipe and took care of the snake.

“It was up in the position to strike again,” Long said.

Zoey still has a one inch scar from the attack.

“Her head was the size of a large grapefruit,” said Denise Long, the boy’s grandmother. “You couldn’t tell where her eyes were… just this little button that you could tell was her nose.”

The vet treated Zoey with antivenin and blood plasma. She has since recovered from the snakebite.

Denise Long said she hated to see her dog get bitten, but she’s glad it was the dog and not her grandson.

So is the toddler’s Mom. “I was terrified,” said Lynsie West. “I used to go out on my 4 Wheeler all the time and I’d see them constantly (snakes), but it never scared me as much as it does now. Oooh, it just gives me the chills.”

Monty Long said after everything settled down and the dog was treated by the vet, he had time to stop and think about what happened, and what almost happened. “That’s when the cold chills went up my neck, for about two hours.”

Long said he’ll be keeping a closer eye on his own back yard from now on.

He said this isn’t the first time there’s been a snakebite on his property.

“About four years ago a rattler bit Cherokee (his painted horse) on the nose.”

The quick thinking Long placed a hose in the horse’s nose before it swelled shut. That action, and another call to the vet, helped save the horse.

The Longs said they understand that snakes are part of the landscape where they live.

They said they’re glad that Zoey lives there too.

“She’s not your typical Chihuahua,” Denise said, “she’s not mean; she’s just a sweet little dog.”

Yipes!

One brave little puppy dog…

Being fat will soon be ‘normal’ in America, study.

Fat the new skinny?

Fashion USA 2015?

 

Forget your worries about Global Warming, Al Qaeda, Bird Flu, hurricanes, earthquakes and stupid Presidents…

Apparently, America is eating itself to death. Yep, that fat epidemic we all keep hearing about is set to define our era like the plague defined the middle ages.

And just when you thought it was safe to take that next trip to McDonalds, they come out with this!

Scientists and researchers from the Johns Hopkins University have concluded that if Americans keep stacking the pounds on at the current rate of pace, 75% of people in the good old US of A will be overweight in just 8 years time.

That compares to 66% of US adults considered overweight in 2004, says The Daily Mail:

“Obesity is a public health crisis. If the rate of obesity and overweight continues at this pace, by 2015, 75 per cent of adults and nearly 24 per cent of U.S. children and adolescents will be overweight or obese,” Dr. Youfa Wang, who led the study, said in a statement.

 They defined adult overweight and obesity using a standard medical definition called body mass index. People with a BMI of 25 or above are considered overweight, while those with BMIs of 30 or above are obese and at serious risk of heart disease, diabetes and some cancers.

The report comes as 11 of America’s largest food and beverage companies agreed to take the token step of ‘limiting’ junk food advertising during children’s TV shows.
Meanwhile, in other fat news, Mexican Manuel Uribe Garza, otherwise known as the fattest man in the world, will undergo surgery in Italy, according to ABCnews.com:

Italian surgeon Giancarlo DeBernardinis told Agence France-Presse, “We will hold a meeting in the coming days to work out the details of the hospitalization and to prepare the operating theater and the appropriate surgical tools.”
Uribe drew worldwide attention when he appeared on the Televisa television network in January.

For the past five years, Uribe has been bedridden. He keeps a television and a computer he uses to update his Web site near his iron bed.

“People think that I can eat a whole cow, but it’s not just overeating, it’s also a hormonal problem,” Uribe said

Manuel has reportedly weighed in at 1,235 pounds, that’s about 560 kilograms for metric lovers like me.

Good luck to him, I say!

And good eating to you all.

World’s fattest man,

An interview with Guillermo…

Here’s a lovely list of some of the more serious effects obesity can have on human health!

Teen murders zebra in drive-by shooting

A despicable act:

A farm with llamas, lemurs and camels has become to scene of a callous act of animal murder.

Zambi the zebra was shot dead as he grazed on lush green pastures in rural Texas, USA, earlier this month, it was alledged.

MSNBC.com reports:

Joshua Romano and four friends were swimming in a creek but had to leave because of rain. They spotted the zebra as they were driving down a road near the farm. That’s when Romano pulled out a deer rifle and shot Zambi dead. The animal was worth about US$10,000.

Romano’s friends tried to prevent him from shooting the zebra, and the driver sped up to make the shooting more difficult.

Meanwhile, there was an unrelated incident in the same US state, where another native African mammal decided to have some vengeance on the humans:

A tiger mauled zoo keeper in the Texas city of San Antonio.

The zookeeper, who specializes in large cats, was flown to a hospital and was in critical condition, a hospital spokeswoman said. The keeper was in his 20s.

The male Sumatran tiger was 4 or 5 years…The zoo was closed after the attack

Bizarre: Gunman demands dinner guest’s money, leaves with good wine, cheese and a lot of love.

 

The Crazy News blog- Random Event of the Week.

So, here’s the scene.

A group of friends and family in Washington D.C, USA, are just finishing a meal consisting of marinated steaks and prawns (shrimp), as we call them Down Under.

The group are now sitting on a back patio discussing life and the universe and such, sipping on fine red wine, making the most of a warm summer’s eve.

Suddenly, out of the darkness, a hooded man bursts in through an open gate and puts the barrel of a handgun to the head of a 14-year-old guest.

What happens next is weird at best…..

Masked Gunman: “Give me your money, or I’ll start shooting”

Dinner Guest: Well “we were just finishing dinner, why don’t you have a glass of wine with us?”

(Now, unmasked gunman takes sip of wine)

Masked Gunman: “Damn, that’s good wine.”

(Masked Gunman looks around at the faces of the group, then takes a bite of Camembert cheese, and another sip of wine)

Masked Gunman continues: “I’m sorry… I think I may have come to the wrong house, can I get a hug?”

One dinner guest, a children’s school worker takes the initiative, giving the now relaxed gunman a nice big warm hug.

Four other guests take their turns at a hug.

Masked Gunman: “That’s really good wine,” taking another sip. “Can we have a group hug?”

The man then walked out, with the crystal wine glass in hand offcourse, filled with Chateau Malescot.

He is yet to be caught.

Read more from The Seattle Times via Washington Post.

It really is nice to know that deep down in side, most criminals just want to be loved.

So next time your dinner party is interrupted by a masked gunman looking for quick cash, offer him some wine and a good hug and maybe everything will turn out all right…. after all, all you need is love

“She never complained”: Pizza waitress tipped $10 000.

Only in America indeed.

Looks like someone hit the jackpot!

A regular Pizza Hut customer named Becky, and her family, decided to use inheritance dollars to tip a 20-year-old waitress in the United States a ridiculous amount of money because, “She was sweet and bright and cheerful and never complained”.

“It’s unbelievable. It doesn’t happen to people every day,” she said. “I mean, I work at Pizza Hut!”

ABCNEWS.com has more.

Video: Most violent day yet in Pamplona Running of the Bulls, tourists hospitalised.

 A number of people from around the world have been seriously injured in Day 6 of the annual running of the bulls festival.

Report from San Jose Mercury News:

The pack of six 1,300-pound bulls and six steers—meant to keep the bulls running in a single pack—disintegrated shortly after the animals set off on the dash through the cobblestone streets of Pamplona in the sixth of eight planned runs.

One stray bull turned around and ran the wrong way. Herders with long sticks smacked it in the rump to get the animal pointed in the right direction.

The loose bull charged and tossed several runners—some of them clad in the traditional red-and-white garb of San Fermin—on its way to the bullring.

Several runners were trampled and seven runners were injured by bulls’ horns. One 48-year-old man from Pamplona was gored in the chest and was reported to be in very serious condition. A 23-year-old Mexican was gored in the stomach and was also reported as very serious.

The other runners who were gored were from Poland, Norway, Spain and the United States, with ages ranging from 23 to 50, officials said. They were all reported to be in serious condition.

Crazy Video of day 6:

See related Crazy News blog on local women wanting “running of the cows” and the “running of the nudes” pre-festival protest by PETA.

US Presidential election gets hot, sexy and a little more narcissistic.

   Taryn Southern

  Amber Lee Ettinger

 The candidates.

US Presidential politcs is like, so hot right now.

First there was “Obama Girl”, a youtube hit from June, and now a former American Idol contestant and actress Taryn Southern, is looking for some cheap exposure; cashing in on election 2008 mania.

“Hot4Hill” is the latest video sweeping the internets, and it’s gotten saucey, with Taryn going for a girl on girl feel, professing her love for the Senator from New York, Hillary Clinton.

The story:

The full ‘Hot4Hill’ video:

& 

“I’ve got a crush on Obama”

Video: Up and away! Man goes skyward in lawn chair.

 

He’s either crazy or knows how to live life to the fullest.

A 47-year-old man from Oregon, USA, has bravely taken to the skies in his own lawn chair in an act known as Cluster Ballooning- carrying a parachute, snacks and some water as ballast, reports CNN.

Last weekend, Kent Couch settled down in his lawn chair with some snacks — and a parachute. Attached to his lawn chair were 105 large helium balloons.

With instruments to measure his altitude and speed, a global positioning system device in his pocket, and about four plastic bags holding five gallons of water each to act as ballast — he could turn a spigot, release water and rise — Couch headed into the Oregon sky.

Nearly nine hours later, the 47-year-old gas station owner came back to earth in a farmer’s field near Union, short of Idaho but about 193 miles (310 kilometers) from home.

“When you’re a little kid and you’re holding a helium balloon, it has to cross your mind,” Couch told local journalists.

“When you’re laying in the grass on a summer day, and you see the clouds, you wish you could jump on them,” he said. “This is as close as you can come to jumping on them. It’s just like that.”

He took off at 6:06 a.m. Saturday after kissing his wife, Susan, goodbye and petting his Chihuahua, Isabella. As he made about 25 miles an hour, a three-car caravan filled with friends, family and the dog followed him from below.

Couch said he could hear cattle and children and even passed through clouds.

“It was beautiful — beautiful.”

Couch decided to stop when he was down to a gallon of water and just eight pounds of ballast. Concerned about the rugged terrain outside La Grande, including Hells Canyon, he decided it was time to land.

He popped enough balloons to set the craft down, although he suffered rope burns. But after he jumped out, the wind grabbed his chair, with his video recorder, and the remaining balloons and swept them away. He’s hoping to get them back some day.

See more from local TV news KTVZ.COM

Local news story “Balloon Man”.

No laughing matter, humour comprehension decreases with age, study.

 

Here’s a joke for you.

Three guys and a lady were sitting at a bar talking about their professions.

The first guy says ” I’m a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know… Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist.”

The second guy says “I’m a D.I.N.K, you know… Double Income, No Kids.”

The third guy says, ” I’m a R.U.B, you know… Rich, Urban, Biker.”

They turn to the woman and ask her, ” What are you? “

She replies: ” I’m a WIFE, you know…
Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc.”

 Laughter

Didn’t get it? Well, yes it was a little sexist and lame but…

A new study suggests that an individual’s comprehension of humour actual decreases the older you get, well duh’.

msnbc.com has the details.

The research indicates that because older adults may have greater difficulty with cognitive flexibility, abstract reasoning and short-term memory, they also have greater difficulty with tests of humor comprehension.

Researchers at Washington University tested about 40 healthy adults over age 65 and 40 undergraduate students with exercises in which they had to complete jokes and stories. Participants also had to choose the correct punch line for verbal jokes and select the funny ending to series of cartoon panels.

Test showed that the younger adults did 6 percent better on the verbal jokes and 14 percent better on the comic portion than did older participants.

“There are basic cognitive mechanisms to understanding what’s going on in a joke. Older adults, because they may have deficits in some of those cognitive areas, may have a harder time understanding what a joke is about.”

Hustler nails juicy sex scandal!, Flynt on the hunt for more?

 

In June we reported that Hustle Magazine publisher Larry Flynt was on the hunt for a new Washington political sex scandal.

An advertisement in the Washington Post from Flynt was seeking individuals who have had “a sexual encounter with a current member of the United States Congress or a high-ranking government official”.

And now it appears that Flynt, a Democratic Party sympathiser, has got his meat.

Earlier in the week a Republican US Senator from the state of Louisiana, David Vitter contacted media and apologized for what he said was “a very serious sin” and that he had “asked for and received forgiveness from God and from my wife in confession and marriage counseling.”

 Senator Vitter

This was apparently tied to the so called DC Madam scandal that has been rocking the US Capital for some months now, leaving resignations from various US government officials in it’s wake.

 DC Madam

Now, Hustler is claiming credit for the outing, saying Vitter confessed after one of it’s journalist reported finding the senator’s number in the escort service’s phone records.

“Larry Flynt’s ongoing investigation into the dirty secrets of prominent elected officials has exposed another hypocrite,” Hustler said.

Some questions remain; will there be more political sex scandals to come? And, was someone payed the US $1million to uncover this latest sex scandal?

CNN has more goss on the juicy political scandal.

Scientists figure out why we hate/love Barbra Streisand.

 

Love it?

Or

Hate it?

An Australian researcher claims to have discovered why singers like Barbra Streisand and Barry Manilow; make people (like me) feel either angry and irritated, or happy and uplifted, Australian Broadcasting Corp reports.

Dr Emery Schubert says he had a gut instinct aboeut why some people found some songs schmalzy, while others found the tunes uplifting and inspiring.

But he decided to find out for sure by studying people’s reactions to songs.

“We know, psychologically, that one of the things that makes people like music is simply familiarity,” Dr Schubert said.

“So if you know a piece of music well enough you will start to like it.

“You may well attribute it to the features of the music – something about the melody and the harmony and so forth, but we also do note there’s a psychological effect.

“The other issue that [I was] interested in [was] the emotional effect.

“The new research that’s just come out is identifying a new measure, a new feature. Basically it comes down to this – if you can measure the emotion that a piece of music is trying to convey, and if you rate that by the particular listener, you [can] also measure the emotion that the listener is experiencing as a result of listening, and you take the difference of those two you get what’s called the ‘Differential Affect Gap’.

“The bigger that gap is – so, for example, if the piece of music expresses a lot of emotion but you are left unmoved by it, it’s a big Differential Affect Gap.

“What seems to happen is that when that’s big, people don’t like the music as much. When the two measures are connected, if they’re congruent between the expressed emotion and the felt emotion, people tend to like the piece more.”

Juror: I’m a liar, homophobe & racist. Judge: Arrest that man!

 

I’ve never had to endure jury duty before and I’ve always thought to myself what I could do to get myself out of it if and when the call ever comes (touch wood it doesn’t).

A friend of mine once suggested that if the call up does come, I tell the judge in the case that I have certain anti-social attributes that might allow an excuse to go home. Well, before I got my chance to try someone in the United States had a go, and boy did it backfire!

A man called up for jury duty in Cape Code, Massachusetts, who claimed he was homophobic, racist and a habitual liar to avoid jury duty earned an angry rebuke from a judge; CNN reports the hilarious exchange between citizen and the state.

“In 32 years of service in courtrooms, as a prosecutor, as a defense attorney and now as a judge, I have quite frankly never confronted such a brazen situation of an individual attempting to avoid juror service,” Barnstable Superior Court Judge Gary Nickerson told Daniel Ellis, according to a preliminary court transcript of the exchange.

Ellis, of Falmouth, had been called to court with about 60 other potential jurors for possible service on a 23-member grand jury.

On a questionnaire that all potential jurors fill out, Ellis wrote that he didn’t like homosexuals and blacks. He then echoed those sentiments in an interview with Nickerson.

“You say on your form that you’re not a fan of homosexuals,” Nickerson said.

“That I’m a racist,” Ellis interrupted.

“I’m frequently found to be a liar, too. I can’t really help it,” Ellis added.

“I’m sorry?” Nickerson said.

“I said I’m frequently found to be a liar,” Ellis replied.

“So, are you lying to me now?” Nickerson asked.

“Well, I don’t know. I might be,” was the response.

Ellis then admitted he really didn’t want to serve on a jury.

“I have the distinct impression that you’re intentionally trying to avoid jury service,” Nickerson said.

“That’s true,” Ellis answered.

Nickerson ordered Ellis taken into custody. He was released later Monday morning.

Ellis could face perjury and other charges.

  The Cape of Cod

More muscle = More sex from women, study.

 

When is comes to a woman’s preference for a male partner, most studies have concluded that desirability was influenced by commitment and offcourse earnings potential, but a new study says physical characteristics matter more.

“Women are predisposed to prefer muscularity in men,” said study author David Frederick of UCLA.

The study was published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, and suggests muscles in men are akin to elaborate tail feathers in male peacocks: They attract females looking for a virile mate.

Women were more physically attracted to brawny men, especially for a fling. But when it comes to finding a long-term partner, they tend to pick a regular man over a mate with huge biceps.

“On the one hand, it makes them more sexy to women. On the other hand, it makes women more suspicious about their romantic intentions,” Frederick said.

So, want more one night stands men? Then get into that gym and those protein bars.

Or, if you’re looking for a more long term thing, then the gym can wait, too much muscle and those jealous women might think you’re going to betray them.

Pensioner arrested for not watering lawn & clashing with police.

A case of only in America?…

Sleepy Orem town.

A 70-year-old woman from Utah, USA, was thrown in jail after refusing to co-operate with local police who arrived at her home to caution her for, wait for it…… not watering her lawn.

Betty Perry, a retired US military and government worker, says she was visited by a police officer who hit her with handcuffs and cut her nose, after she initially refused to give her name.

“As far as I’m concerned, he really abused me – he brutally abused me, for what?”

The policeman even called for backup to help deal with Betty, who was taken to the local holding cells, fingerprinted and booked.

Betty was greeted at her door last week by an officer from the local Orem police force asking about her scruffy, brown grass in her front yard.

When she said she couldn’t afford to water her lawn the cop started to write her a ticket for violating the city’s nuisance ordinance, which requires residents to keep a maintained, live yard.

“I couldn’t believe what went on, it was so bizarre,” she said. “I wasn’t even prepared for it. Once you’re in handcuffs, you can’t do anything.”

She was only released when police administrators learned about the situation.

The craziest thing I’ve heard all week.

  Betty’s castle

Video: Hot Dog! Chestnut cracks the big one.

 

As The Crazy News reported last month the dual between Joey Chestnut of the United States and Takeru Kobayashi of Japan was hotting up.

Today the rivalry crescendoed as America celebrated Independence Day with the famous Nathan’s hotdog eating contest in New York.

The American food extraordinaire beat the reigning six time Japanese champion in a thriller, breaking a new record. The nut scoffed down 66 hot dogs in 12 minutes. That’s a rate of one dog every 10.9 seconds.

Kobayashi finished second with an amazing 63 hot dogs consumed, despite the fact that he was suffering from a jaw injury and a pulled wisdom tooth.

 Here’s the exciting video:

You really get the feeling that one day someone is going to die pushing the limits of food scoffing….

Alien mystery deepens, 60 years on.

 

It is 60 years ago this week since the Roswell Army Air Field released a press statment that said it had recovered a crashed “flying disc” from a ranch near Roswell, New Mexico, a statement quickly retracted a few hours after.

With a 60th Anniversary festival planned for the town reliant on the UFO tourist dollar, the mystery, which has inspired movies, TV shows and documentaries has deepened, with witness testimony shining light about what happend at the old air base just south of the site of the first ever atomic bomb test.

A sworn affidavit from the deceased 1947 Roswell Army Air Field public relations officer.

News.com.au reports the story:

Last week came an astonishing new twist to the Roswell mystery.

Lieutenant Walter Haut was the public relations officer at the base in 1947 and was the man who issued the original and subsequent press releases after the crash on the orders of the base commander, Colonel William Blanchard.

Haut died last year but left a sworn affidavit to be opened only after his death.

Last week, the text was released and asserts that the weather balloon claim was a cover story and that the real object had been recovered by the military and stored in a hangar.

He described seeing not just the craft, but alien bodies.

He wasn’t the first Roswell witness to talk about alien bodies.

Local undertaker Glenn Dennis had long claimed that he was contacted by authorities at Roswell shortly after the crash and asked to provide a number of child-sized coffins.

When he arrived at the base, he was apparently told by a nurse (who later disappeared) that a UFO had crashed and that small humanoid extraterrestrials had been recovered.

But Haut is the only one of the original participants to claim to have seen alien bodies.

UFO pieces handed around

Haut’s affidavit talks about a high-level meeting he attended with base commander Col William Blanchard and the Commander of the Eighth Army Air Force, General Roger Ramey.

Haut states that at this meeting, pieces of wreckage were handed around for participants to touch, with nobody able to identify the material.

He says the press release was issued because locals were already aware of the crash site, but in fact there had been a second crash site, where more debris from the craft had fallen.

The plan was that an announcement acknowledging the first site, which had been discovered by a farmer, would divert attention from the second and more important location.

The clean-up operation

Haut also spoke about a clean-up operation, where for months afterwards military personnel scoured both crash sites searching for all remaining pieces of debris, removing them and erasing all signs that anything unusual had occurred.

This ties in with claims made by locals that debris collected as souvenirs was seized by the military.

Haut then tells how Colonel Blanchard took him to “Building 84″ – one of the hangars at Roswell – and showed him the craft itself.

He describes a metallic egg-shaped object around 3.6m-4.5m in length and around 1.8m wide.

He said he saw no windows, wings, tail, landing gear or any other feature.

Haug ’saw the alien bodies’

He saw two bodies on the floor, partially covered by a tarpaulin.

They are described in his statement as about 1.2m tall, with disproportionately large heads.

Towards the end of the affidavit, Haut concludes: “I am convinced that what I personally observed was some kind of craft and its crew from outer space”.

What’s particularly interesting about Walter Haut is that in the many interviews he gave before his death, he played down his role and made no such claims.

Had he been seeking publicity, he would surely have spoken about the craft and the bodies.

Did he fear ridicule, or was the affidavit a sort of deathbed confession from someone who had been part of a cover-up, but who had stayed loyal to the end?

The US government came under huge pressure on Roswell in the ’90s.

In July 1994, in response to an inquiry from the General Accounting Office, the Office of the Secretary of the Air Force published a report, The Roswell Report: Fact Versus Fiction In The New Mexico Desert.

Weather balloon ‘cover story’

The report concluded that the Roswell incident had been attributable to something called Project Mogul, a top secret project using high-altitude balloons to carry sensor equipment into the upper atmosphere, listening forevidence of Soviet nuclear tests.

The statements concerning a crashed weather balloon had been a cover story, they admitted, but not to hide the truth about extraterrestrials.

A second US Air Force report concluded claims bodies were recovered were generated by people having seen crash test dummies that were dropped from the balloons.

Sceptics, of course, will dismiss the testimony left by Haut.

After all, fascinating though it is, it’s just a story. There’s no proof.

But if nothing else, this latest revelation shows that, 60 years on, this mystery endures.

Australian woman ‘lured World of Warcraft teen’

 

A 31-year-old Australian woman has been arrested in the United States for allegedly trying to kidnap a 17-year-old boy she had met playing role-playing game World of Warcraft on the Internet.

United States investigators say Tamara Broome encouraged the boy to leave his home in North Carolina to join her in Australia.

The chief of detectives in the city of Greenville, Lee Moore, says the pair began a relationship while playing the popular online multiplayer game.

“The best that we can discover is that they wanted to meet,” he said.

“To be honest with you, if someone were to fly from here to Australia or them to here, there’s got to be some kind of romance somewhere.”

Detective Moore says the pair had been communicating for about a year.

“What we understand she was trying to do was to get him to leave the country and go to Australia to meet her,” he said.

Police have seized a laptop computer and charged Broome with attempting to abduct a child.

  Ms Broome

iLoser. Sloths line up for hyped up Apple phone.

       Sloth of a time.

The Crazy News- Tool of the Week

Some people have all the time in the world.

Regular Homer Simpson, Greg Packer, is claiming his 15 minutes of fame for the second time in New York this week. Or is it the 3rd or 4th or 5th time?

The 43-year-old retired highway maintenance worker (retired? how much do they get paid) started lining up to be the first to purchase the new iPhone from Apple’s flagship store in Manhattan, 101 hours before it goes on sale 6pm Friday US eastern time.

  Apple Man

Packer has since been joined by about more than a dozen other iPhone fans and opportunists, who have also chosen to join in on the sit in, braving the concrete enhanced heat of the other famous Big Apple.

Packer says he is relying on food donations and the bathroom facilities at the Apple Store, which is open 24-hours a day.

 Sitting is fun.

This isn’t the first time our good friend has made headlines waiting for fancy new products to come on sale; he was one of the first to buy a Playstation 3 when that went on sale last November. Indeed, he even has his own wikipedia page, which says he has appeared in mainstrem media more than 100 times, quoted by various media organisations since the mid 1990’s infact.

And according to US TV news host Keith Olberman, this guy is a bit of a pest. The Associated Press even put out a memo to it’s journalists, warning them not to “indulge him”.

The iphone retails between $US499 for a 4GB memory and $US599 for one with 8.

And guess what! Our iPhone friend even has his own wordpress blog!

He’s looking for someone to donate him a comfy chair for all that sitting he’s been doing. It just goes to show, you don’t need to have much talent to be famous in America, just ask Paris Hitlon.

You also have to wonder, could this be a smart marketing stunt from the Jobs’ Apple team? Maybe you should ask..maybe I should ask. Naaa…

Update: Interview with iPhone Greg and fellow lineruperer David.

It’s a circus out there!

Meanwhile, on Friday, just hours before the iPhone went on sale in New York City, a camera crew doing a live interview had a number of those gathered in and near the line taunting and swearing at them. A bloke even tired to grab the reporter’s microphone, before being hammered to the ground by security/teamsters.

 

Politician puts dog on roof for 12 hour car trip, back in the 80’s

 

In American politics, if your running for office, particularly the Presidency, it appears anything you may or may not have done in the past is fare game. No matter how trivial or serious.

Mitt Romney is a former US State Governor and is now currently seeking the nomination for President from the Republican Party (the one George W. Bush belongs to).

About 25 years ago, on one of his many family road trip holidays, Romney decided it was a good idea to strap the family pet,  Seamus, to the car roof for a 12 hour journey from Massachusetts to Canada.

And now, a quater of a century later, animal rights activists are outraged.

Time Magazine reports:

Seamus protested in a scatological way, going to the bathroom on the roof of the car.

Animal rights activists said the tale seems a little cruel.

“It is commonsense that any dog who’s under extreme stress might show that stress by losing control of his bowels: that alone should have been sufficient indication that the dog was, basically, being tortured,” Time quoted Ingrid Newkirk, president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals as saying.

Newkirk said it was “a lesson in cruelty that was … wrong for [his children] to witness.”

So, next time you strap your pet dog to the roof of your car for the 12 hour trip, make sure youre not running for President 25 years later, otherwise you might get yourself into trouble.

Lesson learned.

Speaking of PETA.

   PETA Pam

In the drink. The one about the golfer and the gator.

 

A 50 year old amature golfer had a fun old time when his ball landed in a water hazord.

Bruce Burger was trying to retrieve his ball from a pond on the 6th when an one eyed alligotor came out of the water, grabbing Burgers tasty right arm and pulled him in.

The man used his free arm to beat the reptile in the head and was eventually freed. He was taken to hospital with minor wounds.

 “I saw him reach down to get his ball and he yelled” for help, said Janet Pallo, who was playing the fifth hole and ran over to drive the man to the clubhouse.

The pond at the sixth hole has a “Beware of Alligator” sign.

“Unfortunately, that’s part of Florida,” course general manager Rod Parry said. “There’s wildlife in these ponds.”

Talk about your water hazard.

Video: Interview with Bruce, “I’ll be Okay”.

Does this remind you of a certain one eyed alligator in the film Happy Gilmore?

Hot Scoop: King does Paris, media go ga-ga!

 

For more video, story and trasncript of Hilton CNN interview.

CLICK HERE.

King of talk meets Queen of Celeb on CNN.

The Paris Hilton media circus was in full swing, with serious and soft journalists from around the world descending on Hollywood just to see one woman get out of jail.

Hundreds of photographers, camera and sound operators, reporters, bloggers and general losers bombarded her with questions, camera flashes, and general screaming as she walked a media gauntlet to greet her family in a large SUV outside the jailhouse where she spent the last few weeks.

Hilton stepped to freedom just after 12am local time.

Hilton left the media madness with a major convoy in toe, and TV networks across America went live with an OJ Simpson style news chopper chase as the Hiltons spent about 45 minutes on the road travelling to the Hollywood hills for a stay at the heavily fortified mansion of the Hilton grandparents.

Hilton’s stay cost taxpayers US$1,109.78 a day, more than 10 times the cost of housing inmates in the general population.

Paris will chat to TV talk show host Larry King in an interview sure to be one of CNN’s best rated in history.

 Raw VIDEO

Commentary VIDEO

Give me jail! Women’s undergarment robber demands of Judge.

The Crazy News- Tool of the Week 

A judge in Colorado, USA, granted a defendent his wish to go to jail after he confesed to breaking into womens homes’ and stealing their underwear.

Prosocuters had recommended that 40 year old Steven Quatkemeyer be put under probation, as several misdemeanors and six other felony counts were dropped in exchange for a guilty plea from the thief. But probation was not enough for the drug addict, so he demanded he be put in the big house.

“I apologize to the families affected from the bottom of my heart,” a weeping Quatkemeyer told the court. “After a couple of weeks of incarceration, I realized what I had done was very wrong.”

After pleading with the Judge to be locked away, Quatkemeyer was then given a sentence of 4 years.

Defense attorney Mark Rue said Quatkemeyer felt he needed the treatment programs offered by the state prison system.

Police arrested Quatkemeyer for stealing hundreds of pairs of lingerie and panties after a victim who had been subjected to repeated break-ins installed video surveillance equipment.

Quatkemeyer said a methamphetamine addiction led him to his clandestine life of stealing, then wearing, women’s underwear.

Police found night vision goggles when they arrested him.

Thats right, he could have got off with probation, but instead he insisted he go in the big house. He got himslef 4 long years in the slamma. If this isn’t the definition of tool, I dont know what is. I trust you enjoyed the pictures.

6 months jail for baggy pants.

Delcambre town council, in Louisiana, USA, has ordained penalties of up to six months in jail and a $US500 fine for people who wear low-hanging pants, exposing their underwear and body parts to the world.

In ordering the penalties, the mayor, Carol Broussard, described the saggy-pants situation in Delcambre as “way out of hand”.

Albert Roy, the councillor who introduced the ordinance, agreed the fine was steep but said he still favoured the measure. “I don’t know if it will do any good, but it won’t hurt,” he said.

Broussard’s advice for people who like their pants on the low side of decency? “Just wear it properly. Cover your vital parts. I mean, if you expose your private parts, you’ll get a fine. If you walk up and your pants drop, you get a fine. They’re better off taking the pants off and just wearing a dress.”

Sexy Paris Spoof..Hilton the Fake?..And how she’s finally back to real prison..

 

Paris Hilton has been transferred out of a medical ward at a Los Angeles County jail and returned to the all-women’s facility where she began her sentence for a probation violation more than a week ago, a sheriff’s official said Thursday.

After her brief release last week after just three days behind bars caused an uproar, a judge sent Hilton, 26, back into the jail system, starting at a downtown correctional treatment center where she was to undergo medical and psychiatric exams to determine where she should be held.

The official would not elaborate on where in that facility the heiress was housed. When she began her 45-day sentence on June 3, she was confined to a solitary cell in a special needs unit away from other inmates.

 Paris Hilton’s new home from now till the end of her jail term.

Paris was moved around 11 p.m. Wednesday, to the Century Regional Detention Center in Lynwood, the women’s prison where she had started out.

    Americas’ sweethearts….

Meanwhile,

According to OK! maganzine, the Paris Hitlon about face we all heard about from Barbara Walters earlier in the week, has got more to do with her finances than any real remorce.

“Paris finally saw that her spoiled brat behavior and repeated attempts to escape her sentence would turn fans against her, ruining lucrative endorsement deals,” OK! reckons.

A source tells OK!: “It’s going to be hard to find an organization that actually wants her.”

And to cap off this Paris bulletin, I only do it because my traffic goes through the roof…the Paris Hitlon Music Video Jail Spoof……

Yes, the fantasitc Paris Hilton spoof video is doing the rounds here on the interweb, if you havn’t seen it yet it well worth a laugh. So ladies and gentlemen, here it is…The ‘Paris Hilton Jail Spoof Music Video’

I just can’t wait for the spoof of the spoof.

  “That’s hot”

Shawskank Redemption?

Women dream about sex just as much as men.

 

A new Canadian study on what we dream about when we sleep says that men and women dream about sex on an equal level.

The study was based on interviews with 109 women and 64 men who logged their dreams over a period of two to four weeks. The volunteers racked up some 3500 dreams, with 8 per cent of those being of an erotic nature.

It found that women think about doing it with movie and rock stars and politicians or lovers of past, while men dream about making love to multiple partners in public or unknown settings.

The women who took part in the study were twice as likely to have dream scenarios featuring celebrities such as actors Brad Pitt or George Clooney, or Irish rocker Bono, as their male counterparts.

Men, on the other hand, reported dreams featuring multiple sex partners twice as often as the women.

Men almost never had to put their ego on the line and come on to a woman. In about 90 per cent of the erotic dreams males logged, the women made the first move.

“The men had women coming on to them – at least in their dreams,” said author Antonio Zadra, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Montreal in Canada.

The pattern may reflect a certain amount of wishful thinking given the usual social norms that apply in the dating and courtship world, Professor Zadra said.

And finally, when it came to erotic dreams that dealt with sexual disappointments, the genders had very different tales to tell.

The women recounted scenarios where they were turned off by something that happened or the pace of proceedings. For the men, it was more often a case of their virtual partners refusing to engage in certain activities, or their sexcapade plans falling through for some reason.

“Maybe their demands were unrealistic even for their dream characters,” Prof Zadra said.

All the participants in the study were heterosexuals.

Video: Bush’s watch nabbed? Whitehouse says no, video says yes….then says no again…

 

George W Bush received a hero’s welcome in Albania at the weekend, with hundreds of locals draped in the Stars and Stripes reaching out to hug him and shake his hand.

Mr Bush had taken his jacket off on a hot day and was in a short sleeved shirt, the watch clearly visible. It can still be seen as the heaving crowd presses round him – but the next moment it is no longer there.

Mr Bush was visiting Fushe Kruja, a small farming village some 30km from the capital Tirana whose businesses are financed by US grants. He had a cup of the cofffee in the local cafe and then in an impromptu move reached out to greet the crowd. He posed for photos and signed autographs while admirers shouting “Bushie, Bushie” mobbed him and even ruffled his hair.

“There were hands everywhere” said Corriere della Sera. “Most people just wanted to touch him and shake his hand. Someone however had another motive”. It said the incident “sounds like a joke – the one about the Albanian crowd and the Presidential wristwatch”.

Reports from Europe said that ‘Mr Bush only noticed his watch was missing when he got back to his armour-plated people-mover to be whisked back to Tirana airport’. By the time he stood on the aircraft steps to wave goodbye ’someone on his staff had given him a replacement watch’. He is said to wear a $50 Timex with the Stars and Stripes on the dial.

Despite the apparent video evidence, it appears the Whitehouse is denying the watch nabbing, Tony Snow, Whitehouse press secretary says that “the president put it (the watch) in his pocket and it returned safely home.”

Ofcourse the most heavily protected man on the planet couldn’t possibly have his watch snatched in broad daylight, in front of all those highly trained secret service guys right?

Well, it sure wouldn’t be the first time we’ve heard lies from the Whitehouse…

Unless this is all just some elaborate hoax, or did Bush take the watch off himself?

You be the judge, have a look at this video from Albanian TV going gangbusters on youtube at the moment.

It looks like it disappears around 3:12-3:09 second mark, what do you think? 

International theft? or a load of bullshit?

Yes, very interesting indeed folks.

Yeah I thought I would throw Miss Albania in there just for the hell of it…

New video update:

NBC news America has aired new video which seems to show President Bush taking off the watch himself.

Mystery solved??????????????????????????????????????????????

The Visit

Albania apparently spent millions on the Bush visit, even though he was in the tiny Balkan nation for about 8 hours. Giant posters of a smiling Bush draped main buildings, along with thousands of flags, they even named a street after him.

Albanian love for the U.S. stems from 1999, when then-President Bill Clinton pushed for intervention in Kosovo, the Serbian breakaway province with an ethnic Albanian majority.

The U.S. is now the strongest backer of a U.N. plan that could make the province independent this year. Grateful for the help, the Albanians pride themselves of being fervently pro-U.S., and have sent troops to Iraq and Afghanistan.

One old whale, 1880’s weapon fragment found in huge mammal caught off Alaska.

 

Fragments of a weapon used by whale hunters off Alaska in the 1800’s has been found lodged in a Bowhead whale, caught by the indigenous Inupiat people recently.

The fragment shows that the whale could be nearly 130 years old, said Craig George, a wildlife biologist with the borough’s Department of Wildlife Management.

“It was probably at least a yearling when it was struck, because the whalemen never took calves”

  

The Beautiful Bowhead whale in icy Alaskan waters.

The fragment of bomb lace was given to scientists by the Inupiat whalers, who are allowed to catch up to 50 of the speices a year in Alaskan waters.  The hunt is managed by the Alaska Eskimo Whaling Commission. There is a population of around 8,000 Bowheads in Alaskan waters.

The Inupiat have long said that bowhead whales live for the equivalent of two human lifetimes, and the find suggest that knowledge is indeed right.

Commercial whaling is banned worldwide, althought the Japanese would like that to change. Native tribes from Alaska, Greenland and parts of Russia are allowed to hunt whales under a non-commercial agreement.

 In Alaska, meat from hunted whales is distributed to all residents of the hunters’ villages.

Inupiat in Alaska divide up whale meat.

National Geographic video: Bowhead Whales.

Butts steal sh#t tickets. Woman could go for 3 years for 3 toilet rolls.

      A serious case of toilet humour?

Only in America…..A woman in the US state of Iowa, who is the butt of all jokes, has been charged with stealing toilet paper from a courthouse. And the most halarious part of it all, she is facing “potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper”, that even had the police Chief in fits of laugheter.

Yes, you heard it right, thats one year per roll of toilet paper. The state legislators apparenly really value toilet paper, they used to use poison ivy over in Iowa up unitl recently.

Suzanne Marie Butts insists it was the first time she had stolen the paper, but she declined to answer further questions on advice from her attorney.

The fifth-degree theft charge normally carries a sentence of less than a year in jail. But Butts could face more time if convicted under the state’s habitual offender law because she has prior theft convictions.

Butts, 38, was caught last week after an employee saw her taking three rolls of two-ply tissue from a storage closet in Marshall County.

Video: See the local Iowa news report on Butts, quite a laugh!

Paris Interview: I want to build a “Paris Hilton playhouse”

No, not a Hugh Hefner style playhouse, but we can keep dreaming…
       Any excuse to post a blog with this picture in it really….

Paris Hilton has gushed over the phone Sunday to dinosaur aged American veteran jounalist Barbara Walters about wanting to “make a difference”.

“I used to act dumb. It was an act. That act is no longer cute. It is not who I am nor do I want to be that person for the young girls who looked up to me,” Hilton said.

When she is back to freedom (the freedom to be hounded by paparazzi), Paris apparently said she would like to help in the field of breast cancer, which her grandmother battled, or Multiple Sclerosis, which her father’s mother suffered from. She also said she’d like to get toy companies to build a “Paris Hilton playhouse” for sick children.

“I’m not that superficial girl. I haven’t looked in the mirror since I got here.”

Paris called Sunday from the Correctional Treatment Center at Los Angeles County’s “Twin Towers” jail facility where she is serving a 45-day sentence for violating her probation stemming from a drunk driving charge last year, as if you didnt know that alreaddy right?

   Kathy and Rick Hilton with a poster of their daughter, Paris Whitney Hilton.

Walters said she was talking to Hilton’s mother, Kathy Hilton, at 3 p.m. LA time Sunday when Paris called her mom on another line. Paris Hilton said she wanted to talk to Walters herself, so she did.

    “She sounded, first of all, tired but totally aware of what she was saying,” Walter said on the ABC  TV daytime chat show, “The View.”

    “I’m hanging in there but I feel as if I’m a different person,” Hilton told Walters. “I’ve dropped my appeal. I do not want to cause any more problems.”

“I know now that I can make a difference, that I have the power to do that. I have been thinking that I want to do different things when I am out of here. I have become much more spiritual.

While inside Hilton said that she had been reading newspapers, including the LA Times and Wall Street Journal as well as books, including “The Secret,” “The Power of Now” and even the Bible.

So, do I belive that all this turning of a new leaf stuff for Paris is for real?…Not really…

And Hollywood image-makers agree with me.

Based on the way the story has been playing out, this is a good move for her,” said Michael Levine, who has served as publicist for dozens of celebrities, including law brushing veteran Michael Jackson, love her or hater her Barbara Streisand and tough guy Bill O’Reilly. “Experience has taught me that celebrities respect wisdom but obey pain. What I mean by that is that when they feel the heat they see the light.”

“When you’re in a hole, it’s generally a good idea to stop digging … from doing the same idiotic stuff that got you in trouble in the first place…I think that the public this time is disgusted with her and probably asking themselves why they even bother,” he said.

“So she’s on the brink of becoming a caricature or a person. The next step is hopefully to reveal by her words and actions that she has taken responsibility for being an adult.”

So is Paris Hilton going to be a changed woman after her prison stay? Or is this all just apart of her ‘image managment’?, only time will tell.

Walters talks about the interview.

              ”That’s hot”

 How will she ever shake this video?

“Taken screaming” Paris back inside after day of drama.

 Exclusive Paris Interview: I want to build a “Paris Hilton playhouse”

 Video: Watch reaction as the decision is made public by Court spokesman Allan Parachini, who details todays hearing.

Video: The days events from local news reporter.

Video: The media circus.

 Paris not a happy camper as she left her home this morning.

It was a day of drama in LA as Paris Hilton was put back in jail a day and a half after being released by the Los Angeles Sherrif Department on health grounds. Hilton supporters screamed in shock when the verdict was announced  outside the courthouse after a hearing which lasted over an hour.

In scenes sure to be recreated in any future Paris Hilton movie the Billionare heiress reportedly shouted “It’s not right!” and went into hysterics and wept. “Mom!” she called out to her mother in the audience.

She cried throughout the hearing, her body shook constantly and she dabbed at her eyes. Several times she turned to her parents, seated behind her in the courtroom, and mouthed, “I love you.”

       Paris with her parents Richard and Kathy Hilton, sister Nicky, and brothers Barron Hilton II, and Conrad Hilton III.  Taken at Studio 54, New York City, at one of her many 21st birthday bashes.

 

Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer was calm but apparently irked by the morning’s developments. He said he had left the courthouse Thursday night having signed an order for Hilton to appear for the hearing.

When he got in his car early Friday, he said, he heard a radio report that he had approved Hilton’s participation in the hearing by telephone, but he had not.

“I at no time condoned the actions of the sheriff and at no time told him I approved the actions,” he said of the decision to release Hilton from jail after three days.

“At no time did I approve the defendant being released from custody to her home on Kings Road,” Judge Sauer said.

So, clearly the Judge did not have Paris in his good books from the start.

Meanwhile the sheriff who had granted Hilton the right to serve at home said: “The purpose of the early release was the fact that her medical condition was deteriorating. It brought me grave concern.”

He also insisted Hilton’s celebrity status was the reason why she was sent back to jail.

Sheriff Baca said: “This lady has some severe problems” but added her “inexplicable deterioration” puzzled county psychiatrists.

The Hilton family has now appealed the ruling, so it’s likely the Paris drama may continue in the coming days.

Earlier Friday, a weeping Hilton was brought back to court in a police car, apparently handcuffed. She was taken from her home, where she returned yesterday after the sheriff’s department decided she could serve out her sentence in home confinement, with an ankle monitor.

How it all started…

Hilton failed a sobriety test in September after police saw her weaving down a street in her Mercedes-Benz on what she said was a late-night hamburger run.

She pleaded no contest to reckless driving and was sentenced to 36 months’ probation, alcohol education and $1,500 in fines.

In the months that followed, she was stopped twice while driving on a suspended licence.

More in depth post

PLUS- Check out other recent Crazy News posts, bizarre news from around the world.

Back in the slamer, Paris? Drama never ending.

 View new, updated post ‘Paris “taken screaming” HERE.

 Paris Hilton may still yet be screwed around….

A Los Angeles judge has ordered Paris Hilton to appear in court in person today. It was initially understood that she was allowed to phone in, however, the judge ordered her to be physically in court, which will determine whether she should be returned to jail.

  The West Hollywood mansion.

As you probably know by know, Ms Hilton has been allowed to leave jail after only serving 3 measly days of a 45 day term. She is now confined to her mansion in West Hollywood. Hilton was given an electronic tag and ordered to remain under house arrest for the remainder of her sentence.  

The court apperance was prompted after L.A. City Attorney Rocky Delgadillo demanded an explanation as to why the Sheriff’s Department allowed Paris to get out of jail when the judge had expressly ordered her to serve out her entire sentence.

Video: Exclusive video outside the West Hollywood mansion where the media frenzy continues. It is also safe to asume that there will be a massive media scrum at the court where Paris will attend very soon.

Video: To court she will go

“The decision whether or not Ms Hilton should be released early and placed on electronic monitoring should be made by Judge [Michael] Sauer, and not the Sheriff’s Department”-

At the time of Hilton’s release, Steve Whitmore, of the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said: “After extensive consultation with medical personnel, it was decided this reassignment should be done.”

No details of the medical problem could be given for “privacy reasons”, he said, but insisted she had received no special treatment.

                                                    Sick or special treatment?

Civil rights leader Rev Al Sharpton condemned the release as showing the “double standards” of the US legal system.

“This early release gives all of the appearances of economic and racial favouritism that is constantly cited by poor people and people of colour,” he said. “There are any number of cases of people who handle being incarcerated badly and even have health conditions that are not released.”

Early release is “unusual”

Assistant City Atty. Dan Jefferies said that the reason given for Hilton’s release made the case unusual and raised questions about special treatment. He said that releasing inmates due to overcrowding was common but said in his 25 years as a prosecutor, he could remember only two or three instances when people were let go early for medical reasons. In each case,he said, the individuals were extremely ill.

Delgadillo, his boss, agreed: “Los Angeles County jail medical facilities are well-equipped to deal with medical situations involving inmates.”

He added that if Hilton’s “medical condition truly warranted a change in her circumstances” her attorney “should have filed an emergency application with the court and provided my office with the opportunity to respond.”

This aintn over yet folks!
 

 El Mug.

  I’ll do anything to get out?

Bush has a sickie at G8

 

US President George Bush has been taken ill at the G8 summit in Germany.
Mr Bush is said to be suffering from a stomach ailment and is resting in his room.

Bush had to skip a morning working session at the Group of Eight summit, French President Nicolas Sarkozy said.

“President Bush is slightly indisposed this morning and will rejoin the working meeting as soon as he can,” Sarkozy said after an hour-long discussion with Bush, their first bilateral talks since the French leader was elected last month.

Must have been all that pig he ate last night with German Chancellor Angela Merkel.

 

Or

Was it that he was sick of all those leaders “talking too long“?

 Bush with new French President Sarkozy  yesterday

Penguins hitch rides north of the border.

  

How did the penguin cross the border? The question has vexed biologists ever since a Humboldt penguin, native to South America, was found off the coast of Alaska in 2002.

Now they have a likely answer: The flightless bird hitched a ride on a fishing boat.

“Penguins are kind of cute. People like them, and they’re pretty easy to pick up,” said Dee Boersma, a conservation biologist at the University of Washington in Seattle.

Boersma and graduate student Amy Van Buren looked at a series of possibilities for the out-of-place seabird and concluded the boat ride is the best explanation.

They speculate that other penguins spotted in North American waters, although very rare, may also have traveled by fishing boat.

A study on the Humboldt penguin’s trek is published this month in the Wilson Journal of Ornithology

        Happy Humboldt penguins

Check out this video of a cute new baby humboldt penguin at the Oregon Zoo.

Al Hill’s leg comes off, no pain killers, just his poket knife.

  

A man has cut off his own leg with a pocket knife after being trapped under a fallen tree. 

66-year-old Al Hill was alone in the California woods cutting down trees when one apparently fell his way, pinning him for almost 12 hours before he made the drastic decision to part ways with his leg.

“He had a cell phone that couldn’t get out and he started cutting his own leg off,” said longtime friend Cathy Morgan.

Hill had nearly severed his leg by the time a prospector looking for gold nearby heard his cries for help.

“He was in a position where he could not move four inches. I mean he was stuck,” said the Gold digger.

The prospector and another man were able to use Hill’s chainsaw to remove the tree. A medical helicopter flew Hill to a nearby medcial center where doctors completed the amputation below the left knee.

A hospital spokeswoman said Hill was in serious condition on Wednesday, and that he was declining interviews.

News of Hill’s ordeal has captivated the tiny isolated town of Iowa Hill about 100 kilometres north-east of the California capital, Sacramento, where there is no electricity and few services for its 150 or so residents.

“Everybody has just kind of pulled together,” The town’s volenteer fire chief told media. “Anything he needs, we’ll be there for him.”

Residents described Hill as a private man, serious and reserved but well-respected. He is a remnant of the sawmill industry that once dominated their town.

The story is reminicent of a May 2003 incident when 27-year-old Aron Ralston used a pocket knife to amputate his own arm below the elbow in a desperate bid to free himself after being trapped for five days under an 360-kilogram boulder in a national park in Utah.

But Aron Ralston was trapped for 5 long, hard days. This Al Hill fella was only trapped for about 12 hours. Was this a drastic measure, what would you do if you were pinned and had the chance to get out by cutting yourself free? Would you cut or wait?

Amature porn killing professional industry.

 

The online availability of free and low-cost pornographic photos and videos has begun to take a toll on the sales of X-rated web sites and DVDs. An article in Saturdays New York Times has revealed that inexpensive digital technology has allowed aspiring amateur pornographers to flood the market, while the rest of the porn industry gives away more material in order to lure and maintain paying customers.

“People are making movies in their houses and dragging and dropping them onto free Web sites…It’s killing the marketplace.”, says a porn executive.

And Companies in the business are even supplying much of the free porn samples. “They think that if they give people enough of a free sample, they’ll come back and pay, but that’s not true, but in reality… people are surfing for free material, getting what they want and then leaving.”

Some companies are experiencing drops in revenue of up to 30%, and there are even claims that there has been a drop in the quality of plot and story lines, (as if they could become any worse). “There’s not a whole lot of story — it’s basically right to the sex, but we’re consistent with the quality”, says one industry insider.

Figures released recently show that the revenue from sales of pornographic videos, rentals and purchases dropped to US$3.62 billion in 2006, down from Us$4.28 billion in 2005.

 So people, get your act together, quit filming and showing your home movies online, and let the pros do the work. Your killing the fun for us all, fore-shame!.

Jericho; TV fans go nuts after cancellation, literally.

  Not crazy, its f*#king nuts!

Passionate fans of TV show Jericho have launched, and may be winning, a campaign to have the show put back on the air by sending millions of nuts to CBS TV executives across the United States.

In May, when CBS Television cancelled the show about life in a small rural town after a nuclear holocaust, legions of fans were incenced, and plans were soon hatched to have the show re-instated. The idea to send nuts was soon chosen, and with a little help of some smart marketing from nutsonline.com, the campaign took off, and now some rumours say the show may get 8 more episodes. 

Quoting an anonymous source, The Associated Press Tuesday said CBS is reconsidering its decision to cancel the show. A decision on whether to bring the show back, probably for a mid-season run, is imminent. Is this a PR stunt to stem the flow of nuts, or is it genuine? Only time will tell Jericho fans.

Jericho cast and babes…

Why nuts?

In the final episode of “Jericho,” the town is under siege from a neighboring community.  When asked to surrender, lead character Jake Green, played by Skeet Ulrich, has a one-word response: “Nuts.”

The response is a reference to Gen. Anthony McAuliffe, a U.S. Army general who in World War II was surrounded by Germans demanding his surrender. His response: “Nuts.”

All I have to say is, what a waste of food.

See what all the fuss is about, 2006 Jericho promo. 

“Watch Out!” Iron Mike goes Bollywood, and he’s got a “Licence to Kill”.

  

Former heavyweight boxing champion and ear eating extodanare Mike Tyson is to star in an action thriller which would see the U.S. boxer imitate real life, India’s Mumbai Mirror said.

The former heavyweight champion featured in a promotional music video of newly released Bollywood film “Fool and Final”, but the cameo received such a positive response from viewers that the director  even incorporated the number in the film.

“I had decided to make a film with him later but after the promos featuring him received a great response, I decided to start the film sooner,” said producer Firoz Nadiadwala, who produced “Fool and Final”.

The daily said Tyson is getting a “huge price” for the new film — which will feature three top actors and be directed by a renowned filmmaker — but did not give any figure.

Tyson will play the role of a boxer, in a film expected to have a mix of drama and song and dance you would expect of your usual Bollywood film. The movie will be titled “Licence to Kill”. How original.

    “Fool and Final” babes.

 See the Tyson Bollywood promo, in all its lispy glory….

And for the “Fool and Final” theatrical trailer…it looks pretty exciting.

 yummy ear…

On the hunt for political sex scandal: Larry Flynt (Hustler), bidding at $1million.

 

“Have you had a sexual encounter with a current member of the United States Congress or a high-ranking government official?”

That was what readers of the Washington Post were confronted with Sunday, as Hustler magazine launches a bid to uncover any Washington sex scandal it can get its dirty hands on. A toll free number and email address was provided for anyone willing to come forward with documented evidence of illicit intimate relations with a congressman, senator or other prominent officeholder.

The last time Flynt made such an offer was in October 1998 during the drive to impeach President Bill Clinton over the Monica Lewinsky scandal.

In the following months, the pornographic publishing mogul threatened to expose one or two members of the Republican Congress pushing for the impeachment, according to media reports at the time.

Anyone who comes forward with a compelling story will receive a cool US 1million dollars. So any one out there got the goods? Is it you? I sure hope so.

Ashera: At $20,000, the worlds rarest and most intelligent cat could be all yours.

Mix the African Serval  

                  

& The Asian Leopard Cat

     

With your regular domestic cat.

& you’ve got yourself…

“The Cat of the Century”

The ultra-exotic  “Ashera” cat.

 

At a cool $20,ooo plus US dollars, the uber trendy Ashera cat is said to be the largest, rarest and most intelligent domestic cat. US based company  Lifestyle Pets Inc. has already sold two of the felines to an unknown Beverly Hills family, as well as a Russian mogul in Moscow.

A proprietary blend of the exotic bloodlines of the African Serval and
the Asian Leopard Cat and subsequently crossing with a domestic cat,
the Ashera is unique in that genetic monitoring is used to standardize breeding and ensure that the defining features and size of the Ashera remain exceptionally consistent.

Fully socialized, the Ashera gets along well with children and other
pets, acting and playing like a regular domestic cat. Unusually for cats,
the Ashera takes well to being walked on a leash (cat walk). The Ashera will be limited to less than 100 per year.

So all you need is just a spare 20,ooo US bucks and you’ll be all set. I think I’ll pass thanks, I’m more of a dog person anyway.

Speaking of Meowing, I thought I might just throw this one in for a cheap feline based laugh.

Hot dog! Cracking the old Chestnut.

 

A California man has smashed the world record for hot-dog eating, gobbling up more than 59 franks in 12 minutes. Joey Chestnut surpassed the record of 53 3/4 hot dogs — held for six years by Takeru Kobayashi of Japan.

The 22-year-old set the record Saturday in Arizona in a regional qualifier for Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest at Coney Island, N.Y. Chestnut will now be able to face off against Kobayashi at the July 4 championship.”These guys’ numbers have just been going up at a tremendous clip,” said contest spokesman Ryan Nerz.

 ”I always thought there was a limit — a limit to the human stomach and a limit to human willpower.

Chestnut admits he will have to strain his body to win at the New York title event. “I’m going to keep pushing my body and maybe I can beat him (Kobayashi),” Chestnut said

 

Chestnut ready to blow in a previous hot dog eating comp…”Bbbluu..”

Judging by the way Kobayashi slams down those dogs, the strain is going to have to be severe.

Knoxville gets sued for genitals in a mousetrap prank.

 

Actor Perry Caravello is suing Jackass star Johnny Knoxville, TV host Jimmy Kimmel and radio personality Adam Corolla for US$10 million. Caravello alledges he was promised money and promotion of a movie if he carried out a stunt that involved putting his genitals in a mousetrap.

The stunt was intended as a promotion for the DVD release of Windy City Heat, in which Carolla, Caravello and Kimmel all appeared.

But the stunt went wrong and Caravello “was severely injured when the trap literally went on his manhood”, according to papers filed in the Los Angeles Superior Court.

“Cameras both hidden and exposed capture the fun and pain when Caravello is inexplicably cast as the star of a supposed film called Windy City Heat, in which he portrays a character named Stone Fury, a hard-boiled Chicago ’sports private eye.’

“It’s all just a complete goof, of course. But the real Caravello doesn’t know that,” said the paper in its October 2003 review of the telemovie.

Caravello is claiming US$10 million over the stunt, plus an extra US$500,000 for humiliation after the stunt-gone-wrong was distributed on the internet.

                                               You’ve gotta ask, is this for real, or just a really tame stunt to boost DVD sales of the movie Windy City Heat? (which was a flop)

People eat more when watching Letterman, Leno.

 

Chin meet Daddy.

The more entertaining the program, the more youre likely to eat. That’s according to research presented in Canada by Dr Alan Hirsch from Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago.

Dr Hirsch explored the impact of smell, taste and eating behaviours on people while watching TV by measuring potato chip consumption.

45 volunteers ate as many chips as they wanted during five-minute intervals over three-week periods while they watched monologues by late-night US talk show hosts David Letterman and Jay Leno.

Dr Hirsch found people ate an average of 44 per cent more chips while watching Letterman and 42 per cent more while viewing Leno, than when they did not watch TV. Clearly proving that David Letterman is more entertaining.

“If you can concentrate on how the food tastes you’ll eat less because you’ll feel full faster… so if that’s the case, let’s look at the opposite. What if you’re distracted? If you’re distracted, in theory, then you’d eat more,” Dr Hirsch said  

Many studies have linked obesity to watching television and that link is likely due to inactivity, Dr Hirsch said. But perhaps entertaining shows are also contributing.

“If you want to lose weight, turn off the television or watch something boring,” he said.

So switching off Jay and David for less entertaining programming might just be the new weight loss fad. You heard it here first.

   Mmmm, salty snacks.

Baseball manager not a well man.

       Phillip Wellman in saner (and by the looks of it slimer) times.

The manager of a United States Minor League Baseball team, The Mississippi Braves, has gone on a crazy tirade. Phillip Wellman apparently had enough of the umpires, springing out of the dugout to let his temper flare. After a nose-to-nose argument with the home plate ump, Wellman completely covered home plate in dirt. He then made his way up the third base line, where he ripped third base out of the dirt and hurled it into the outfield.

As if that wasn’t enough retribution for Wellman, the manager then got on all fours and crawled toward he pitcher’s mound like a special ops commando, grabbing the pitcher’s rosin bag, holding it to his mouth and tossing it toward the home plate umpire as if it were a grenade. Scooping up the bases, Wellman walked toward the center field exit, taking a bow for the crowd before leaving the field.

Here’s the video…I hope you enjoy it, I know I did!

Sexsomnia, happening in a bedroom near you!

      People are still having sex.

You can add sex to the roster of unlikely sleep behaviors known as parasomnias, which range from sleep driving to sleep eating, say psychological health experts.

“Sleepsex” or “sexsomnia” as it is being called occours during partial arousal from deep sleep, when the brain regions devoted to higher thought, judgment and reasoning are shut down, and areas governing more primitive functions (such as locomotion, eating and sex) are still active.

“One man had been initiating intercourse on almost a nightly basis,” says a psychologist about one case of sleepsex. That was apparently fine with his wife, until “one night he started snoring.” In another case, a female sexsomniac routinely groped her husband. Whenever he responded, “she would wake up and accuse him of forcing sex on her while she slept.”

Not all cases of sleepsex are so amusing. Canadian Jan Luedecke had a history of sleepwalking. One night he’d been drinking at a party and found himself sacked out on the couch with a woman he’d met there. Hours later, she jolted him awake and demanded to know what he was doing. Luedecke claimed he was unaware he was having sex with her. “Under the law, if there’s no intent to commit a crime, you haven’t committed a crime,” says Dr. Colin Shapiro, director of the Youthdale Child and Adolescent Sleep Center in Toronto, who testified for the defense. Luedecke was acquitted (to the outrage of women’s organizations in Canada), and the case is now on appeal.

The condition is highly treatable with the generic anti-anxiety drug clonazepam. Seeking help can only work to a sufferer’s advantage. After all, if you’re going to have sex, you might as well enjoy it.

Hoggin up the Ham.

 

Fred the dead hog…too ridiculously massive to fit in frame

An apparently wild 476 kilogram and 2.74 metres long hog, shot by an 11 year old Alabama boy recently, was not so wild after all. It was reported Friday that “Monster Pig” actually used to go by the name Fred, and was bought as a Christmas gift in 2004 by a pig farmer for his wife.  

The Blissitt family of Alabama had actually raised the monster on their farm, but sold the pig away to the Lost Creek Plantation four days before Freds’ death, as it was too massive for the pig farm.

“I just wanted the truth to be told. That wasn’t a wild pig,” Rhonda Blissitt, the pig farmers wife said.

Jamison Stone shot the huge hog during what he and his father described as a three-hour chase.

“We were told that it was a feral hog,” Mike Stone, Jamison’s father said, “and we hunted it on the pretense that it was a feral hog.”

The Blissitts said they did not know their hog was dead until they were contacted by a game warden for the Alabama Department of Wildlife and Freshwater Fisheries. The agency determined that no laws were violated in the hunt.

Phil Blissitt said he became irritated when he learned that some thought the photo of Fred was doctored.

“That was a big hog,” he said.

What a hog wash.